Master your Ego

by admin on

When I was in 3rd grade, there was this bully in my class named Mike who would always beat the crap out of me.

Mike was a huge kid, he must have been held back a few times because he was twice as big as all of us.

Mike lived in my neighborhood and every day I lived in fear as I walked home from school,

dreading his violent behavior which ended up with me being on the receiving end of his beatings.

I lived in terror at a young age, not knowing what he would do next.

I will never forget this one day while I was in the school playground with my friends and the worst of the worst happened,

Mike was walking towards me with this anger in his eyes that I have never seen before.

He was having a bad day and he took it out on me.

He came out of nowhere, grabbed me by the collar and pushed me up against the fence.

My heart stopped because I saw a look of terror in his eyes that I had ever seen before.

I immediately covered my face, but he just kept on hitting me with all his might.

He kept on hitting me over and over again and it felt like an eternity of pummeling.

Soon after, my legs got weak and I went numb from all the pain and fell to the ground.

Adrenaline was pulsing through my body and I literally felt like I was going to die! In between blows I looked around.

Nobody would help me even though there was a crowd of parents just looking in terror and disbelief, but not willing to get involved.

Mike’s terror continued and he would beat me up every single day. I did not want to tell my parents about these beatings, but one day my dad noticed my black eye.

I had to tell him what Mike was doing to me. My dad sat me down and told me that if I don’t do anything, it’s only going to get worse.

He said you have to be aggressive and fight back.

That was the first time my father ever gave me that type of advice, so I mentally prepared myself.

I knew the next time Mike was going to bully me I wasn’t going to take it anymore.

I remember the day like it was yesterday.

As I was getting out of school, he was following me and calling my name.

I started breathing deeply and clenching my fists, flexing all of the muscles in my little body.

Then he put his hand on the back of my shoulder to grab me,

and at that moment I turned around and I pushed him to the ground with all of my force.

His eyes opened up in terror and I said to him as I pierced into his soul,

“I’m going to Fucking kill you if you touch me again!”.

The fierce anger in my eyes meant every word!

Mike was stunned and his face turned white. Even I was shocked. I had no idea that I had that kind of power.

He was in shock and the fear ran over him.

He knew I meant business and he then apologized profusely.

From that moment on, he left me alone.

I realized that as I got older, the same bully that affected me as a child,

was now my Ego.

Our ego beats us up everyday and reminds us over and over again

on what we did wrong

or the fact that we are not enough.

It goes back to our past and replays the same old painful memories over and over again to make us suffer.

Many people are bullied by their ego constantly to the point where they commit suicide to escape.

But not me, I wasn’t going to allow my Ego to control me!

Every day, we must battle the Ego and not let it beat us up and push us around.

We must observe and know that it’s there

but it can’t do shit if we don’t let it affect us.

The Ego is not entirely bad,

I would not be as successful as I am today if I was Egoless.

It is a double edged sword,

it can make us a success,

but it can also make us suffer.

The key to life is to Master your Ego

and not become its slave.

Simply being Aware of it allows you to use it as a useful tool

rather it controlling you and making you suffer.

Just like the day I stopped the bully’s beatings,

when you shine the light of awareness

on your Ego it loses its power over you.

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